Character Before Calling

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Character counts. I learned that at Carl Sandburg Elementary School in Wheaton, Illinois. It was literally written on our walls.

Responsibility. Integrity. Citizenship. Trustworthiness. Etc. Etc. We all agree, those are great things that kids should learn as they grow and mature.

And yet, somewhere along the way, I feel like the conversation surrounding character has been lost. The easy scapegoat is smart phones; Jonathan Haidt’s brilliant (and harrowing) work in The Anxious Generation has me thinking a lot more about the effects of smart phones on our lives. But at some point, we also need to look in the mirror and ask ourselves where our priorities and ambitions have been hijacked.

As a professing Christian, and follower of Jesus who has worked in church and para-church organizations for the last 12 years, I’ll admit I am a part of the “problem.” I worked at a large church for 7 years and, as I was labeled as a “good communicator,” I had the opportunity to preach every once in a while on Sunday mornings. And guess what? I liked it. Did I like the prep? Did I like delivering the messages? Or did I like the affirmation I got afterwards? Did I like preaching the Gospel, or did I really like the feeling of having influence?

I felt important. I felt like I had something to say. I felt like I was an important voice. And what happened next is what I would describe as a shift in priority. On the pedestal of importance in my life, personal growth and personal spiritual formation moved down, and opportunity moved up. I desired the platform. I desired to have influence.

Are those things wrong? Probably not? But also maybe? At the time, I was in my mid 20’s. Here’s the truth - what could I possibly be influencing people towards? I DIDN’T KNOW ANYTHING! I HADN’T DONE ANYTHING! In retrospect, I was like a 9 year old AAU basketball player who felt compelled to have an IG channel of drills targeted towards NBA players.

Ambition is great. Ambition that moves at a faster rate than the growth of your character is dangerous. And it took me leaving my role at the church for my to identify the fact that I desired influence and leadership that my character was not ready for.

I love working with students and young leaders. One of the first things I ask people I meet with in those demographics is, “who do you want to be?” Not what do you want to do. Because here’s my dirty secret - I don’t think God cares that much about what we do (there’s nuance to this that I don’t have time to explain on this post). I think he cares about who we are.

To the young leader who is ambitious - praise God for your ambition! I think ambition is a gift of God. Be ambitions. But be ruthlessly intentional about your personal formation. Be afraid, in a healthy way, of having leadership and influence that you are not prepared for. Honor God with the little that you have, and believe he will intrust you with more later.

Character still counts. 10 years ago, and even on my worst days now, I care more about being known for my accomplishments than my character. May God change that in me day by day, from now until eternity.